Terry Ravenscroft

I was born in 1938 in the small town New Mills in the Peak District of Derbyshire, England. My mother had a particularly long and difficult delivery, largely because she'd forgotten to take off her tights. My parents decided to share equally the responsibility of bringing me up. I proved to be a difficult baby, often throwing tantrums and crying for long spells, especially when it was my father's day to breast feed me. Eventually I grew out of this and at the age of five started my formal education. I was a bright child as my mother had painted my head with luminous paint so she could pick me out easily when she came to collect me from school. When I grew up I became a comedy writer and have written television scripts for most of Britain’s top comedy acts including, amongst others, Les Dawson, The Two Ronnies, Morecambe and Wise, Alas Smith and Jones and Not the Nine-o-clock News. I also wrote many episodes of the situation comedy Terry and June and my own radio series Star Terk Two. I now write humorous books, sixteen up to now and counting. One of them, Stairlift to Heaven, has received 82 x 5 star UK Amazon Customer Reviews. 

Stairlift to Heaven

Autobiography/humor

Stairlift to Heaven (The journal of an OAP.) Don’t miss this one whatever you do! Although Stairlift to Heaven is written by an old age pensioner, non-coffin (casket) dodgers should not be put off by this. Everyone will be old someday, if they’re lucky, and there are valuable lessons in coping with old age to be learned here. Stairlift to Heaven has been likened by one reviewer to be ‘Like Last of the Summer Wine on cocaine’ Another said “This journal really will make people of any age laugh out loud -there is enough in Stairlift to Heaven to keep the whole world laughing.”

Stairlift to Heaven 2 – Further up the Stairlift

Autobiography/Humor

A further volume chronicling the life of an old age pensioner. As with its 82 x 5 Star Amazon Customer Reviews predecessor Stairlift to Heaven those people of non-coffin (casket) dodging age should not be put off by this. There are valuable lessons to be learned here in coping with old age, in addition to advice on how to deal with troublesome dogs, dog walking, horses, faith healers, gipsies, solicitors, council officials, busybodies, and sundry other nuisances, plus useful tips on hoovering, letter writing, mounting a defence should you be taken to court, coping with being sentenced to Community Service (if your defence in court has proved to be inadequate), how to get the best of, and avoid the worst of, a holiday in Turkey, what to do should your home be burgled, what to do if your bank has 'good news' for you and lots, lots more.

Captain’s Day

Humor

At Sunnymere Golf Club the meticulous plans put in place by club captain Henry Fridlington and his good lady wife Millicent ought to have guaranteed that his Captain's Day will be the best day of his life. However Henry has recently enforced a strict 'no swearing on the golf course' policy, a policy which has not gone down at all well with the membership - and a policy which is largely instrumental, along with more than a little help from Henry himself, in ensuring that far from being the best day in his life his Captain's Day turns into the very worst day of his life.

Better than sex - Lee Westwood
Not as good as sex - Tiger Woods

James Blond – Stockport is too Much

Humor

After foiling the plans of countless power-hungry villains bent on world domination the bringing to book of the evil Dr Goldnojaws, who only wants to dominate humble Stockport, England, shouldn’t present too much of a  problem for top secret agent James Blond. However in addition to taking on Goldnojaws and his evil sidekick BloJob, Blond has to wrestle with a prostate problem, so things aren’t quite as straightforward as he would have liked. Then to make matters worse he starts having girlfriend trouble....with Pisa Vass, Divine Bottom, Gloria Snockers and Ava Shag amongst others.

Dear Coca-Cola

Humor

Putting pen to paper with hilarious results, in Dear Coca-Cola Terry Ravenscroft homes in on the Food & Drink industry. Household names such as Heinz, Ryvita, Tesco, Cadburys and of course the Coca-Cola Company are the targets for his entertaining epistles, resulting in a laugh-out-loud letters book with a difference. And you really don’t want to know what he asks Jacob’s Biscuits for! But you will when you’ve read his letters to them. You will never look at the contents of your ice box or kitchen cupboards in the same way again. Dear Coca-cola has garnered 88 x 5 star UK and US Amazon Customer Reviews thus far.

Dear Air 2000

Humor

Letters from the world's most troublesome (some would say troubled!) passenger. Dear Air 2000 is a hilarious collection of correspondence to and from forty different airline companies. After reading this book it is doubtful if you will ever risk eating an airline lasagne ever again. You may not even board an airplane again. Over 100,000 copies in paperback and ebook already sold.

I’m in Heaven

Humor

I’m in Heaven is about a man who doesn't believe in God who dies and goes to heaven. However it is a heaven that is far from being most people’s vision of heaven - all sweetness and light and lazing about on a white cloud with angels playing harps - but something far, far different. Oh, and the Beatles are there. All of them, not just John and George. And Sir Michael Caine is a resident there too. And Robert de Niro. And Jehovah's Witnesses, who don't like it at all.

Zephyr Zodiac

Humor

Zephyr Zodiac is the story of a Mark 3 Ford Zephyr Zodiac from the time it rolled off the production line in 1962 until it meets its end in a car crusher in 2012, and how it affects the lives of seven of the people who own it during that time. Read how during its fifty years on this earth it was used as a company car, a family car, a wedding car, a funeral car, a taxi, a home, a safe, a Classic Car, how it was given birth in, stolen (more than once), used to have sex in (much more than once), and was instrumental in giving its grateful owner his life back.
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